ThE SeXy DiVa!

 {Dealing with a break up}

By Joyce Gondwe (Baby-Faced Diva)

It’s been said countless times that all good things come to an end one day…life, job, marriage, love…you name it! And talking of love; romantic relationships in particular, up to now, The Baby-faced Sexy Diva is yet to get convinced on why other beleaguered chicks shed tears after a break up. I mean, why???

Am I the only one who thinks it’s kinda weird and utterly stupid to cry over someone who doesn’t wanna be part of your life? Honestly speaking, I ain’t got no time to cry and waste my precious tears (which I don’t have) over a nigga who doesn’t want me in his life. Issaaa (in Lhomwe accent), crying over a dude is a waste of your hard-earned make up… And makeup is way too expensive, you know what I mean, fellow divas, not so?

Isn’t it funny how the other side does expect we them ladies to shed tears when love goes sour? Such an expectation normally gets pregnant when it’s them dudes who’ve caused the hullabaloo. Is it because they think we are that pathetic to cry over them? Tell you what? It’s indeed not only pathetic but also ridiculous to cry over a man. Crying over a break-up is for Babies..!

Dear Gals, we need to grow up!! You don’t have to cry for an ass that’s dumped you. Well, you can do whatever you want to do but crying shouldn’t be on the list. Don’t stoop so low. You too cute for that, galfriend.

Once incident still stands out during my wee years in my romantic career. It happened that one of those ‘Landlords’ of mine then, took me for an outing. Little did I know he had something up his sleeves. So he took me out. Imagine taking me to a restaurant just to dump me… hahaha eti decent break up. He ordered pizza (my favorite). So, as I was sorting out the contents of my plate, he let the cat outta the bag. It was over! Imagine!

The dude was like, “Tacy whatever I told you was true, my feelings for you were true but we can’t go on, I’m moving on without you.”

Hard as it was, them Tacy Baybie never quitted devouring the contents of the unlucky plate that was on my table. I kept on eating. For your own info, eating, especially those delicious foods, is Tacy’s number one sport. As I was devouring my pizza, them Nigga was like “I know you gonna cry but it’s okay you can cry”.

Tacy was like, Wtf??? I had to burst into laughing. There were two slice of pizza remaining on my plate. I picked them all and walked off. He tried to stop me but I raised my right hand’s middle finger and screamed “f&@k you asshole”!! He texted me later and was like “what a bad ass b**ch” hahaha!

Here is the difference between big girls and babies. After a break up, kiddos would lock themselves in their room, cry day in day out, and starve themselves to death until they get skinny. Not only that, but babies will even attempt committing suicide and they keep on checking on the murf*^ker to see if he’s changed his mind. Holy, F^^ck! That’s so pathetic like for real. Why bother?

Here is what big girls do. They don’t even say goodbye. They go home, take a bath, put on their favourite make-up, party with friends, eats junk like nobody is watching, do some squats for the shape of their body to be intact and live life to the fullest. Just make the a^^hole wish they’d that ass back. Big girls utter the F-word with no remorse, screws them hapless dude and move on. When they do, they don’t look back.

I can go on and on pouring some recipes for living a happily-single-after life to my fellow divaz,,,,but I had to stop for now.

So, fellow Sex Divaz, don’t let these nigga get into you… Dont waste your tears over stupid things… Yeah i mean these niggaz acting like a bunch of low class basic ass bi^^hes…. they can just drain your energy.



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