A PERVERT’S NEWS DIGEST
LILONGWE: Perplexed by the ongoing self-upgraded teachers’ vigil at the Ministry of Education’s premises, a revered senior official from the ministry has decried Malawians’ inability to differentiate between official pronouncements and mere quips. The lady’s remarks have come following the revelation that self-upgraded teachers, mostly primary school teachers from rural areas, are holding a vigil at Capital Hill to force the government to promote them to higher pay grades.
“They are claiming that we promised to upgrade their salaries once they use their hard-to-find private funds to upgrade their qualification, but I don’t remember us saying that,” said the flabbergasted senior offical.
“Well, if we did promise, then it is clear that it was just a joke. Come on, people,” clarified she.
Responding to the development, a rights activist from Mombera University, Haida Nnyengeni has cautioned the ministry to desist from messing with civil servants’ fickle emotions.
The lady has argued that pranking teachers is the last move that a government that has endured a tumultuous relationship with the education community should be playing.
“Government knows that teachers are bounded by solidarity and if this situation remains unaddressed, it is a matter of time before teachers from Karonga to Nsanje down their tools in support of their dissatisfied comrades.
“Considering that Christmas and elections are around the corner, the government really risks shooting itself in the foot here,” reasoned Nnyengeni.
Meanwhile, when asked if she understands the gravity of the domino effect that the developing vigil could initiate, the Madam from the Education ministry laughed off the theory.
“Like I said earlier, we didn’t mean it when we said that we would increase their meagre salaries and I think the whole nation knows this. But if they are serious about this vigil thing, then they can go and get comfortable behind Kamuzu memorial tower. With the departure of the ex-MYPs, I am sure there is enough space to set up 5-star accommodation there.
“Talking about the ex-MYP, isn’t it funny how we easily demolished their shacks? They thought they could take the government for a ride lol,” said a giggling Maa’m from the education ministry.
By press time, unverified reports had reached us that a self-upgraded teacher who has travelled from Malavi Primary School in Chiradzulu for the vigil is feeling let down by his counterpart from the same school for putting up at his brother’s place in Kandikole instead of spending days and nights at the vigil.